Blind Wind
by Suen Yuu Qi
Summary: [TezuFuji] Is it too late for Fuji to get back what he had lost? And probably more than that?
1. Chapter 1: Long Gone

**Blind Wind: Chapter 1 - Long Gone**

Be nice P lol It's the first time I'm gonna test out a story divided into chapters. And I know I can be a bit wordy, so I divided it up into paragraphs.**  
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A small boy, precious and sweet, his face filled with the colors of autumn, his presence that could mean a thousand diamonds, his beautiful shimmering eyes that had been so sea-blue.

That small boy, now his knees down on the ground, his hands by his side, clenched in a hopeless fist. One hand was raised up, leaning against the sakura tree in front of him. He was a boy, the boy who was crying in tears that meant nothing to anyone at all.

And maybe this would be the last time he could cry, for all his tears would be wasted away and he would have no more left.

* * *

The strongest wind cannot be seen. It cannot be felt. It cannot be heard. It cannot be touched. One moment there is nothing and the next, it brushes past you ferociously. 

But the weakest wind is visible. It is avoidable. It is evident. It is in the focus of the eye, a sound audible to the ear. Yet it can do no more than rustle the leaves on the trees.

_Leave me._

Fuji is a weak wind. He is in the attention of the fan girls at Seishun Gakuen School. He is noticed wherever he goes, through the hallways, a break to the bathroom. The well-known prodigy: a god to loyal fans and a lion to his opponents.

But just as a weak wind cannot wreck a house or bring a tree tumbling down onto the ground, Fuji could not grasp the eyes of Tezuka Kunimitsu, the captain of the Seigaku tennis team.

_Leave me. I don't want to know you. I don't want to see that face of yours ever again._

May Fuji be granted all the wishes he could wish for he was not granted Tezuka. And may Fuji try all he might he sorrowfully knows deep down that Tezuka could never be his. Because Tezuka was a strong wind: he was the strongest. And Fuji was the weakest. Luck occurs to the one who is chosen, and Fuji was not that one.

So strong Tezuka is, he could do more than beat his rival at tennis. He could hurt Fuji. He could break his heart, tear him apart, and rip him to pieces until all he has left are the tears flowing like a waterfall down his cheeks.

He could rob away the light in Fuji's blue eyes, steal away his smile like a theft, and above all, take away what Fuji treasured the most: Tezuka himself.

He could do that. He could do all that, his power, his influence, his strength.

_Iya…Tezuka…_

_Don't you dare call me that name again!_

And perhaps that was what he did.

* * *

**FLASHBACK **

"_Tezuka!" His hand reached forward and grabbed the shoulder of the other one._

_Immediately, Tezuka turned around and jerked the hand away. "Don't even try to touch me!" The fire in his eyes stung Fuji for more than a mere two seconds._

_A horrible silence filled the room to its peak. _

_His mouth trembled as he spoke the words. "Te-Tezuka. What did I do?" He touched Tezuka's arm and unbelievably, Tezuka did not react. "Ne? Tezuka, tell me."_

_Tezuka saw the horrid grieving look in his friend's eyes. And right there, for a moment, he thought he might have been mistaken. For a flash there, his emotions softened, the anger on his facial expression lessened. For just that split second, he felt that he wanted to comfot Fuji, to tell him how sorry he was._

_But then he stopped._

_So this is how Fuji had been controlling people. This is how he could be cruel, how he could make one do what he wanted. His mental power over others, Tezuka frowned at this thought._

"_Leave me."_

_Fuji's did not release his grasp, but nor did he tightened it._

"_Leave me. I don't want to know you. I don't want to see that face of yours ever again," Tezuka said in a stern, but quiet voice. But once said, he turned his head toward the wall next to him. No, he was not going to see Fuji's face. Fuji will not control him. Not anymore. This is payback time._

"_Iya…Tezuka…" The voice haunted Tezuka's mind._

"_Don't you dare call me that name again!"_

_And surely enough, Fuji let go. He let go of Tezuka's arm. He had given up, had let go, had let free of something that had remained a part of himself until now: Tezuka._

**END FLASHBACK **

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* * *

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"Ne! Tezuka!"

He turned around to see Oishi running down the sidewalk toward him.

"So how has it been going? Are you ready for our practice today?" Oishi asked, a grin spreading across his face as he made eye contact with Tezuka.

"Ah."

So everything was still normal since yesterday…so far at the very least. And it stayed that way for the rest of the school day. And even during tennis practice, everyone acted just as if nothing had happened. Of course, they wouldn't know. Momo and Kaidoh got into their usual arguments as did Echizen indulge himself with a continuous winning streak.

Kawamura went on with his famous phrase, "BURNING!" throughout the whole time he played the seniors, Oishi and Eiji enjoyed their usual doubles playing, and Inui made the practice worthwhile scribbling down who-knows-what in his notebook.

But of course, a normal day like this would only mean the absence of Fuji.

"Saa, Tezuka-buchou, do you know where Fuji is? I haven't seen him all day. Perhaps he's sick?" Momo had asked him around ten minutes into the practice hours.

"Mm. Perhaps." Unfortunately, that was all Momo received. On the other hand, Tezuka secretly kept his own thoughts to himself, as he always did.

Somehow today, things seemed to move a little slower than usual. It occured to him that he didn't seem to have enjoyed the day as much, and because of that, nor did the other regulars. Due to his bad mood today, many of them joking around had been punished to run 20 laps around the court, and probably more than just one time. Though probably not very importnat, Inui had begun to scribble small little notes in his notebook about Tezuka's attitude today. And he also jotted down another aspect: Fuji was missing.

"Hmm."

"What is it, Inui?" Kikumaru asked, adjusting the frizziness of his red-colored hair.

Inui closed hi book and put away his pen. "88.7 percent that Tezuka would be like this in due to the matter that Fuji is not at practice today."

"Ne? Hontou!"

He shook his head slightly. "They aren't the kind of people who show their weaknesses that easily. For that, I may be off. But presumbly, Fuji's absence is the only reason I've narrowed down to so far."

But then, perhaps Fuji was there all along. Perhaps there was a pair of eyes from behind the locker room, staring out into the open tennis courts since the very beginning. Perhaps there was a true nature hidden, running along like a small shadow so no one could catch it.

And perhaps, that shadow ran away before Tezuka turned around.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Saa, so how was it then? Please review! XD I dunno how long the chapter should be. Is it too long? Or is it too short? Too wordy? I'd like to know 

And I think that this fanfic will be about...2 or 3 so chapters? Maybe 4, but basically, not that long XD (I'm not ready for long stories yet)


	2. Chapter 2: Gazing Upon Two Split Sides

**Blind Wind: Chapter 2 - Gazing Upon Two Split Sides**

I am probably going to make this four chapters actually, seeing how I'm going to plan it all out

* * *

Fuji walked solemnly down the street, each step taken with extreme care. His hands were cupped together in the front of his brown furry coat. A soft breeze encircled him, bristling through his hair for only a few seconds before it traveled even further down the road. 

Although he kept his eyes straight forward, his head raised up, his shoulders and his back straightened, his skin exhibited an obvious pale color. More than that, his eyes didn't glow like the sea as it had before: instead, a dull emptiness dominated the blue color.

It didn't occur to Fuji where he was heading for. In fact, he didn't have the slightest clue why he was even out here. His sister, Yumiko, had left a letter noting that she would be back late and the only thing Fuji remembered after that was slowly making his way out of the house.

He felt the stain in his eyes. Was he crying? He didn't even know. His mind had already gone blank, had already stopped thinking since yesterday. His heart had already stopping beating since that occurrence with Tezuka.

Suddenly, Fuji laughed. "So this is how it feels like to lose someone so close to you ne? Maa, I haven't felt like this in such a long time."

Yes, that's right, it had been quite a while since he had endured this feeling. It has happened before, but somehow, it never occurred to Fuji that it would happen again. The last time, Yuuta had left him and although a tear did not leave his eyes, a part of Fuji had left along with his younger brother.

But he survived that time. That's right. He was strong, a powerful wind, and so, he survived. Which means, he should be able to survive this time round.

Right? Isn't that how it is supposed to be?

Right?

Right but no. The answer was that simple.

Fuji wasn't strong anymore. In fact, he has never been strong. So how he had managed to survive without Yuuta in his life, he had Tezuka.

Fuji smiled to himself. Ah, that same feeling, the feeling of care, of hope and love. Even after Yuuta had gone, Tezuka was still there. Maa, so it wasn't that bad before. Tezuka founded comfort for Fuji and that was basically all Fuji had ever asked for. He asked for it and Tezuka gave it to him.

But now…

Hadn't they all left him just the same? Yuuta? And now Tezuka? Everyone he had loved? Everyone he had cared for? Hadn't they all just torn him apart?

It didn't matter how much Fuji cared anyone. No, it didn't matter. He could give up his life for someone and that person would never realize that. No one ever did.

He smiled sadly. "Heh, and I had even thought he loved me. How clumsy I had been."

* * *

_Ring! Ring!_

Tezuka hurried out the shower room, a towel wrapped around his waist and another over his hair. He picked up the phone.

"Moshi moshi?"

"Ah, Tezuka!" The familiar voice happily responded. "How's it going?"

Tezuka clasped the phone in between his ear and his shoulder, busily drying his hair. "What is it, Oishi?"

"Ah, nothing to worry about. I was wondering if you knew where Fuji was."

He frowned. Again? When it came to Fuji, everyone always asked Tezuka about him. Somehow, this aggregated him even more.

"Iya. Why?"

Oishi sighed. "Ah, nothing. Eiji called me. He said he tried to get in contact with Fuji to ask for homework help in one of the classes they had together, but it seemed like Fuji isn't home. He had called about three times already and no one picked up the phone."

He chuckled. "Heh, and so because I didn't have Fuji's number, I thought you might know. I mean, you two are pretty close friends. But I guess you---"

"He is no friend of mine." The sudden harsh voice echoed on both sides of the phone line.

Oishi stopped, his eyes widening, his laughter diminishing in one split second. What did Tezuka say? Did Oishi hear him out right?

Tezuka, though always stern and almost emotionless in the way he always speaks, this time though, every word came from a deep meaning of rejection and denial. True, Oishi had noticed that Tezuka wasn't much in a mood today (not that he ever has one), but he had always thought it was because Fuji didn't come to tennis practice. And adding to that, it was considerable that Tezuka knew the reason why.

But now, to hear Tezuka say such words, all full of emotion, hate and disgust…

"He is no friend of mine," Tezuka repeated. And he hung up the phone.

* * *

This is how a true man honors his values. It is something so deep it is in the bones. The pain of the flesh means nothing. The pain you must forget because sometimes, that is the only way to remember what is in the bones. You must peel off the skin until there is nothing. Nothing at all. No scar, no skin, no flesh. No pain, no nothing. 

Fuji wondered if that was what Tezuka did as he stared up at the window. He wondered, did Tezuka see him? Did he notice his prescence? Could he sense him? And if he did, did he even bother that Fuji was standing right in front of his house?

_Nothing at all. No scar, no skin, no flesh. No pain, no nothing._

_Nothing at all…no pain…_

In his mind, Fuji kept questioning to himself, inquisitive as he is. Maybe Tezuka's way of forgetting the past was forgetting the pain. Perhaps to deal with the pain, one must forget about the past. It's a one-to-one ongoing moral: forgetting everything that happened between them.

Fuji grimaced. How strong, to forget someone so close so easily, Fuji thought.

Suddenly, Fuji saw Tezuka appear at the window. The eyes, the brown eyes, glaring down at him.

So the flesh is gone, the bone is exposed. The eyes told everything.

_Leave_, it said.

Simple, yet hurtful.

_Go away. You don't belong here._

Fuji looked away at that. So where exactly did he belong? Where exactly should he go? He came here, at Tezuka's porch steps, at his house. And now Tezuka tells him to go somewhere else. So where?

Nowhere. Fuji looked up again. Tezuka was still there.

Once you're burned, it'll only hurt the most when the heat stings the bones. The stinging red and orange substance eats away the skin and the flesh, peeling it off in the most sickening way. Then it goes even deep and chews on the bones, the deepest part of a human being.

And like now, Fuji winced as he found himself the victim of Tezuka's eyes that shined like fire. It was cutting him open and invading the sacred values Fuji kept so precious to himself. Was it really so easy for Tezuka to pretend to forget him?

So he should, Fuji responded, his eyes gazing up to send each message.

_You're still mad, aren't you? Yet, I don't even know why._

No reply.

His blue eyes filled up with grief, dim like the drought of ten suns in the eastern sky. _Help me out here, Tezuka. Tell me. What did I do to you? Why must you be angry?_

And then Tezuka turned away, the curtains unfolded themselves and quietly stabilized just as still as the night outside.

* * *

**Author's notes:** Well, if you're confused about the italics part when Fuji and Tezuka were speaking, it's by eye contact. You know, it's not worded, but the meaning stays the same. 

Anyways, hope it wasn't so bad. Thanks for the reviews everyone, it helped me out greatly.


	3. Chapter 3: Sacred Remembrance

**Blind Wind: Chapter 3 – Sacred Remembrance**

Ah, thanks a lot for the reviews pplz! Here is the next chapter. It's a bit longer than the other ones, but it's probably going to be the longest chapter of the whole story anyways. The forth chapter would be the final one, so it's almost close to done XD

Oh, and please excuse me for my spelling or grammar errors. Getting a little lazy afterwards It's like starting off so perfectly, then running out of time and rushing over everything else. But don't worry, this chappie basically has all the confusions puzzled out together. Enjoy!

* * *

He almost cursed himself for turning away because the next moment he looked out the window, there were no signs of Fuji anywhere nearby already. But then, it stunned him how he was reacting. 

It's been like this always. Even as much as Tezuka tried to turn away from Fuji, tried to ignore him, tried to pretend that he didn't care or just wasn't there, a part of him somehow yearned to be there anyhow. It was as if he had no control over his emotions, over his actions. What Fuji was doing to him was beyond imagination; Fuji was holding him in his hands, clinging onto him and Tezuka could do nothing about this.

He punched his pillow. Why, he thought, why are you aiming at me? Why have I become your victim? Why have I given in for so long? Why didn't I see the real you before? You scowl, Fuji, you hideous creature.

So what now, Fuji? Do you see? You're weak. Without me, you're nothing at all. And now everyone will see what kind of man you really are. You'll never be able to smile like that again, I guarantee you. You'll never be able to taunt me like you did before, ever, ever again.

"You'll never succeed," Tezuka growled. "I'll make sure of that."

And through the middle of his mind that raced like clouds in a turmoil, the doorbell rung.

* * *

"You want something to drink?" 

From across the room, Oishi shook his head. "Iya, I didn't come over to have a cup of tea." He grinned and put down his tennis bag onto the floor.

Tezuka sighed and walked out of the kitchen. "What are you doing here then?"

"Ah me?" Oishi scratched his head. "Ah, nothing at all. I just thought you might like a friendly visit. You know, since your parents are out for these few days, I wanted to check up on you and see how you're doing."

Oishi smiled. And Tezuka examined that smile carefully.

Liar, he thought.

"Talk to me now," he demanded. "I have other things to take care of also."

He need not say any more. He knew Oishi well, for they've been friends since the first year of middle school. And he need not do more than to sit on the sofa because he knew very well that Oishi would talk to him now.

Whatever the matter was, Tezuka planned to make it short and simple. For some reason, he wasn't in the mood for chats, not that he had ever been, anyhow.

Oishi sat down, his face serious, his expression stern and considerate. "Tezuka, what happened?"

"What do you mean?" Tezuka asked quickly even though he knew already.

"You and Fuji. What happened?"

Silence in the room flowed around, drifting in every corner of the house. The wind blowing outside could keenly be heard and the flickering of the light remained intact in their eyes as they stared into their own comfort zones.

The lingering quietness of the environment made Oishi uneasy after about 7 minutes and thinking that perhaps Tezuka did not want to discuss about the situation, he got ready to stand up.

"He has no place anywhere."

Oishi stopped and lifted his head by surprise at Tezuka's response.

"In society, in school, during tennis practice, even during the weekend fun, he has no heart for anyone around him." Tezuka lifted his head, laid back, and stared at the ceiling, as if melting his thoughts through the roof and out into he atmosphere, where it all disintegrates and slowly dissolves into the air around.

"No stranger can see who Fuji really is. His smile protects him, it soothes all the people around him. His soft voice, his facial expressions, they all seem so simple on the surface. Everything seemed so conservative.

"But no. I saw him. I saw deep into him, who he truly is and had always been. And the smile on his face is completely unrelated to what I had saw."

Tezuka clasped his hands together. Oishi continued to watch his friend.

"He was weak. Yes he was. He let me get too close, close enough to find his true face. Baka Fuji. Baka, he can actually think that he can hold me up for life in a world of fantasy? His world? A world where he pretends to be someone else and I believe every fake word he says and the actions he does?" Tezuka's face turned into a mix of anger and hatred, his fists and teeth clenched tight.

"That was why I left him. His smile was neither happiness nor smpahty. It traumatized me. It was taunting. And his quiet, sweet-like voice, I found, cannot comfort you. Instead, it stays inside you, haunting you, cursing you. It is an addiction. One word out of his mouth and suddenly, you are pulled within his range.

"He is beyond cruel, this Fuji Syusuke. All that he has and all that he can give to the world is famine and devastation. Look at him! His ridiculous smile, his thin size, his sickly pale and fragile skin, and his enjoyment of every haunt he poses onto his victims. He frightens them, controls them, and make them his dagger.

"I don't want to be used. I have no wish to become a dog for Fuji, to do what he planned, to fall into his traps. He has no right to control me. That is why I left him. Because I chose to let free of his grasp, his weak grasp."

Suddenly, Tezuka smiled. "And now look at him. Look at his true self. He is nothing at all, he isn't strong, he isn't self-sufficient. Instead, he is like a flower vase. Once the flower is removed, the vase has no use anymore and then it is abandoned. No more use, because the flower is gone."

The two met eye contact. Oishi had a soft expression on his face, one of sympathy and consideration. Another part of him tried to comprehend and elaborate the true meaning of Tezuka's words.

Tezuka sighed. "You probably don't know the real meaning of what I'm really talking about Oishi. That is fine. I was once a close friend of his and that was how I knew. I don't expect that you understand my words fully."

"That's right Tezuka."

Tezuka turned down and looked at Oishi questioningly.

"That's right, Tezuka," Oishi repeated, his head cowering his face down toward the floor. A low, quiet tone to his voice hinted a slight sadness within. "And I don't expect that you understood Fuji either, even as how close you may have gotten to him, you never knew him well enough."

Tezuka looked at his friend. "What do you mean by that? I tell you, you know nothing about Fuji."

Oishi looked up. "No Tezuka, you don't. There is still so much you haven't learned yet."

He frowned. "And what don't I know?" he challenged.

"Many things," Oishi took a deep breath. "You don't know anything at all."

"Like?" Tezuka wanted to yell. Perhaps he shouldn't have told Oishi that long speech he just made earlier. Why couldn't Oishi get it? Tezuka didn't expect him to understand well, but it seemed like Oishi had his own side to this. Out of all the people, Oishi always understood Tezuka. So now, why couldn't he understand?

"Like…like the fact that he loved you."

He froze.

"Fuji loved you, Tezuka. That was something you did not see."

* * *

That night, Tezuka laid in his bed, his eyes open, staring at the ceiling and the shadow of the light out his window. He had rewind his memory over and over again, making sure he did not detect a mistake, making sure that what he had heard were the exact words that Oishi said. Throughout the whole night, he could not sleep. 

_Fuji loved you, Tezuka. That was something you did not see._

Fuji…loved me?

Yes, that was what Oishi had said. And Oishi, Tezuka knew, unlike Fuji, always told the truth as it is.

And the conversation replayed again in his head.

* * *

"Fuji…_loved_ me?" Tezuka said quietly. 

Oishi remained silent. After all, there was nothing more to say then.

Tezuka looked at him. "I don't know what you mean."

"That's just it. You don't understand anything. Everything you see in Fuji is evil, is always the opposite of everything. But you can't see the truth."

Oishi stared at Tezuka. "Tezuka, you even said so yourself. You said he was weak. Actually, he is weak. But he is weak without the essentials he needs in life. He needs you Tezuka. He needs you to be strong."

His voice grew louder.

"That's right, you said so yourself even! You said that he let you get too close. He let you get too close to him to seek out his real self, his true identity. That's just it, Tezuka. He wanted you to see him because he trusted you. He put every heart, everything he loved so much, everything in reliance upon you!"

Suddenly, Oishi stood up, angry eyes steaming hot like fire into Tezuka's.

"And then you destroyed him! You couldn't see him, you couldn't see what he wanted, what he intended to do so. You used the fact that he let you come into his heart, you used that privelege and tore his whole being apart! Look what you did Tezuka-san! TEZUKA!"

Oishi extended out his arm and pointed a threatening pointer at the shocked Tezuka. "Weak you say? Fuji? Weak? I say he is strong. He is strong on the inside and the outside. As for you, you are weak, Tezuka. You were given something and not only did you throw it aside, you wrecked it! You wrecked Fuji! And for that, you are a mentally ill and weak man.

"And you say he controls you? You control yourself! You make yourself think that what he is doing is just selfishly taking you over! So once you felt something for him, you think that he is jailing you? Trapping you? Locking you within an imaginary tower?"

Tezuka was frozen to this spot, all the while taken aback by his friend's anger. Not a word could leave his throat. Neither a sound nor a peep.

Oishi softened his temper and placed a hand over Tezuka's shoulder. "Tezuka, do something for me tonight…"

* * *

Lying in his bed, Tezuka recalled Oishi's words. 

_"Remember the time when you helped him stand up when Fuji lose his younger brother, Yuuta? Remember that, Tezuka?"_

Tezuka sat up on his bed. That was quite a while ago.

But Tezuka frowned at himself. What was Oishi getting at there? What had happened that time was dim in Tezuka's memory. What had he said? What ha dhe specifically said to Fuji? Yes, he remembered having helped Fuji somehow, so what was it that was bothering him?

Suddenly, his head jerked up. He had said…he had promised Fuji something…

But…

What had he promised?

* * *

**Author's notes:** Ne, so how was it then? I thought it was a bit corny and I'm not that great at expressing Tezuka's emotions, so please forgive me for that ; I enjoyed writing this chapter. And just as so, I hope you all enjoyed reading the chapter as well. 

Next up! The FINAL chapter XD Lol, it's quite a short story then.


	4. Chapter 4: Catching The Wind

**Blind Wind: Chapter 4 - Catching The Wind**

Ne, sorry for the long wait. It's been crazy these days >( And right now, I'm publishing this around midnight O.O I hope it's not TOO long. I never planned to extend the story to much.

* * *

Blow from the South. The wind leaves no trail. 

Throw sand from the East. And then come hither from the North and the West.

He cannot see. He is blind. Make him lean away from the wind so he is easier to knock down.

The wind roared with laughter, and then it died down to little puffs, his own breath. And then he wore a triumphant smile. "The strongest wind cannot be seen."

* * *

Fuji recalled so long ago when Tezuka had come to him the time Yuuta had left. It had once felt as if that event had happened only yesterday, but now, it felt like an eternity ago. Somehow, it almost seemed like now that it never had even happened. It probably had, but the "Tezuka" Fuji thought he knew probably never existed at all. 

Then again, maybe it was only to Fuji's misconception before.

_It's all right, Fuji. It's okay._

_It'll be all right. I'm right here, Fuji. I'm right by your side. And I'll always be here whenever you need me. I'll always be here for you. I promise._

Fuji winced. Those words…

_I'll always be here for you…I promise._

He laughed. He extended out his arms, reaching to the sky, tilted back his head, and laughed. He laughed at the world, at himself, at his innocence, at how clumsy he had been.

"So much for the promise, ne Tezuka?"

**Flashback**

"Oishi."

The locker room was dark. The clock was ticking and the other regulars have left. And so, Oishi was taken by surprise as a soft voice mumbled his name. Fuji had been so silent sitting on the bench there.

"Ah, Fuji? I didn't see you," he smiled back.

Motionless, Fuji went on as if Oishi did not even hear him. "Ne Oishi. Do you think Tezuka ever notices me?"

Oishi blinked, a puzzled expression pasted on his face. "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean, he won't hurt me, right?"

For a moment, Oishi stood there, his mind racing as fast as it could, encoding the words Fuji had just said to him. Yet, it didn't take long for him to understand. After all, Oishi's talent has been partly counseling.

"Fuji."

In the dark, a little movement made way as Fuji faced the direction where he heard Oishi's voice. A hand patted him on the shoulder.

"He will love you, Fuji. He will."

**End Flashback  
**

Fuji sat on his bed, plopping his coat on the floor by his feet. Then, gradually, he closed his eyes and let the darkness consume him and all the while wondering if he'll ever wake up, wondering if he'll ever show those blue eyes, his weakness, his true self, to anyone ever again.

Never. No, not ever…

* * *

"Syusuke!" 

Fuji fluttered his eyes open. The bright light forced him to yank the cover over his face.

"Syusuke." The door opened and Fuji could silently sense his older sister approaching him. "Ne Syusuke."

Fuji turned around, putting on his famous friendly smile. "Ah, Yumiko-chan. Nani?"

"Eh, your friend is at the door. He wants to see you."

His eyes propped open. A friend? Could it be--?

No, it couldn't be. "Who?"

A grin. "Tezuka, of course!"

Then again, yes it could be.

"Wh-what for?"

Fuji sat up, listening all the while to the cheerful sound in Yumiko's voice. "Ah well, I suppose he was thinking that today is Saturday, but he's never asked to see you before, so I was a little shocked. It's okay if you are. He said he wants to take a walk with you in the park. Are you okay with that? I mean, I can definitely do all the chores. I want you to have a good weekend. It's going to be nice and sunny all day."

It took about 7 minutes, even after his sister left the room, for Fuji to digest what he had just heard.

_Why would Tezuka come? Why come for him? At this time?_

Fuji shivered. A million questions began to contaminate his head. Did Tezuka forgive him? Is Tezuka going to tell him that everything is okay? That it was a big mistake? Or perhaps, does Tezuka want to taunt him more? Hurt him even further? Yet, how could Fuji solve this if he didn't know why Tezuka was acting the way he was toward him?

Somehow, Fuji kept a little hop in his heart that Tezuka was there to provide him the comfort he did in what seemed like ages ago. But a little nudge inside Fuji almost told him that that was not so.

_He is going to give you the worst, _it said.

_The worst, that's right. He'll make you feel like you want to be dead._

And then the voice extended upon that, as if stabbing a knife right into Fuji's heart without touching the flesh.

_Get over with it. He's gone. You can't have him anymore. You've never had._

So then perhaps Fuji had to forget about it, face Tezuka and get over him. If so, perhaps Fuji could move on in his life and leave the past behind him then. Perhaps, this may be the only way, and Tezuka probably already knew.

A gust of wind swept into the room, fluttering the papers on the desk twirling in mid-air before landing on the floor. Yet, right before that, the door slammed shut already, leaving the window open and letting the autumn leaves find their way into the room.

* * *

A bright sun in the sky. A rustle in the leaves. A light breeze and fresh scent in he air. A playful round-the-road for the little chipmunks and the squirrels. And most important of all, Tezuka right beside him. 

The scene was welcomed. But it was denied as well. For this was what it was like when Tezuka said those threatening words before.

"_Leave me."_

"_I don't want to see that face of yours ever again."_

An up rise of uneasiness divided the two apart. So tensed he was, Fuji couldn't stand it any longer.

He stopped.

Tezuka stopped as well.

He opened his mouth to speak, but words did not form and his throat could not choke out a sound.

So it was Tezuka who offered an acknowledgement. "Fuji."

Fuji looked down. It was quite unusual. Tezuka was somewhat back to the way he had known him all along. It was as if he has forgotten what had happened before, what he had said to Fuji. Perhaps it was a taunt, to make Fuji uncomfortable, for the pleasure of seeing him hurt, for another attempt at knocking Fuji down onto the ground again and taking away everything that meant the most to him.

But there was a slight tinge in the way he speaks as well. 'Fuji' was said almost as if…

…almost as if it was something so precious, so innocent.

Fuji swallowed hard. "You called me out here."

A hesitation.

"What do you want with me then?"

It was simple, just a couple of words said, but they were somehow so hard to make out for Fuji. It was like having a sore throat and trying to sing a song.

"Nothing at all," Tezuka replied casually. "I just want to have a walk with you."

Again, it was so simple, yet so hard to make out. It was so incomprehensible.

"A-a walk?" Fuji frowned. "But--" He couldn't say any more. It was too hard. It was too confusing, too puzzling. There was so much to say but so little words to use.

"Fuji, don't cower. Look up at me."

It was a command. It was shockingly a command. Like a buchou. Fuji tightened. Like his old self, but in such a state, it was like a scold.

Obediently, Fuji raised his head up.

And the next thing he saw was Tezuka, his face, his eyes…him. Not Tezuka when he had told Fuji to go away, but the Tezuka who supervised the team, who played tennis, who wore that stoic expression, who always gave a strict, emotionless expression. It was simply Tezuka. Simply Tezuka.

But Fuji couldn't understand. Wasn't Tezuka mad at him? Wasn't he suppose to yell at him? It was what Fuji expected, but it didn't happen.

And then those eyes closed its lids halfway. A sad look spread across Tezuka's face.

"I miss your smile."

Fuji could only stare, his eyes wide open in almost disbelief.

"You have a beautiful smile. And I miss it."

And by this time, Fuji was shivering, shaking as if it was ice cold outside, though the wind did not consist of such a temperature.

But the next minute, he was shaking even more when he suddenly found himself in the embrace of Tezuka.

He gasped.

The arms, those strong arms had wrapped themselves around the thin boy.

And the captain's chest had nested against the boy's face.

And then the face had lowered onto the boy's head.

Those arms tightened, locking the boy within his zone.

But finally then, those words.

"I'm sorry, Fuji."

And then those tears.

"I miss you. I miss your smile and your laughter."

Maybe Fuji should be happy, graceful that even though he had no idea what had gone over Tezuka before, now, things just might be all right. Or maybe Fuji could just pull away and reject Tezuka for the hurt and anger he was burdened with.

But Fuji just stood there, breathing deep into Tezuka, feeling the close warmth, the closest that Tezuka had given him.

And just then, those words suddenly whispered into Fuji's ear.

Those words that would not leave Fuji's memory for a lifetime to come.

"I love you, Fuji."

It echoed, it chimed, it sang, over and over again.

And perhaps right then, Fuji didn't know if Tezuka was the one who caught him or if he was the one who caught Tezuka. And he didn't know if the strong wind had swallowed up the weak wind or if the weak wind had silently stalked the strong. And he didn't know which direction the wind came from, perhaps the Sourth, perhaps the East.

But he did know…Fuji did know that one way or the other, both winds, the strong and the weak, had collided, had entangled around the other and had bind into a supreme gust of wind in the form of a tornado. And at last, they were now inseparable.

* * *

**Author's notes:** Eek! > I apologize for the horrible ending. I'm always bad at those stuff and gah! The dramatic scenes! And I didn't take much to revise the chappie, so if there's any disconinuity, please forgive me TT 

Anyways, I hope that I did just fine, well hopefully enough at the very least. So how was the story overall? I guess I kind of devided up the chappies 1 and 2 cause they seem to be about the same things lol P But, I thought I might have a little fun at cliff hangers lol XD

Ooh! And just so you know, the last paragraph in the story, well, I was kind of planning to relate it to the literal physical erm..."stuff" Tezuka and Fuji were doing when I said they "entangled" around each other and "bind" together kinda. Well, hope you caught that. If ya didn't, I don't mind.


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